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2:24 AM : Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Man Dies After Being Buried Alive Beneath200 pounds of Elephant Shit

Friedrich Riesfeldt loved his job as a zookeeper, and took great pride in the care of his animals. So much in fact that he took a very personal interest in trying to relieve a viciously constipated elephant named Stefan.
In order to help mitigate the elephant's constipation, Friedrich fed Stephan over 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes to try to break the elephants bowels. Unfortunately for Friedrich, the elephant let loose while Friedrich was standing directly behind him as he was trying to administer an olive oil enema. The force of the sudden load of shit that came from the elephants ass came without warning, pinning Friedrich violently to the ground, slamming his head against the concrete with such force that he was instantly knocked unconscious and consequently Friedrich the zookeeper suffocated beneath 200 pounds of elephant shit!

Just to give you something that you can compare this too, 200 pounds of shit is the equivalent of a dump truck full of mud. Even after he was completely buried the elephant apparently continued to relieve himself. Poor Friedrich was under all that shit for an hour before someone who’s attention was caught by this ungodly pile of feces got close enough to see what was Friedrich’s uncovered foot.


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